The Baby Boss

With all due respect to the members of a certain family-oriented organised crime syndicate, there is no more demanding “boss” than a baby.

Stressed out at work? Your baby has no idea what work is – pick her up.
Get a little gaggy at the contents of those diapers? Your baby laughs at your discomfort – change her.
Just want to sit down and watch a game? Your baby isn’t interested – entertain her.
Want to eat dinner with your wife? Your baby is hungry NOW – feed her.

The baby boss is not interested in your reasons for not providing her with everything she needs. She will not tolerate any lessening of the services you deliver. Once you’re in with the baby, you’re in for life.

There is an upside to all of this:

Is your boss at work giving you shit? Your baby doesn’t care – you’re still the best man in the whole world.
Think there’s no good in this world? Look at your baby smiling – instant hope.
Need a laugh? Wait ten minutes – she’ll do something cute to make your whole day.

Just make sure you keep coming up with what she needs. Otherwise, she’ll bust you out like the Bamboo Lounge in Goodfellas.